Doris A. Shaughnessy

When Doris Agnes (Wassel) Shaughnessy greeted you, she did so with a million-dollar smile and blue eyes that sparkled, letting you know she viewed you as a great gift from God.

It was as if you were being welcomed and embraced by an angel. But not just any angel. She was the epitome of a guardian angel—an angel who is often sweet, gentle and joy-filled, but who is also tough and feisty when she needs to be, an angel who knows the hard knocks that life can bring and who is ultimately there for you, cheering for you, guiding you, protecting you and loving you. Because that’s the purpose God gave to guardian angels. And Doris lived her life that way.

So there’s the firm belief that Doris was immediately welcomed by the guardian angels in heaven when she passed away at the age of 96 on March 4.

There’s also no doubt that she was quickly embraced by her husband of 67 years, John. Their union was so complete that even in their last years together, they sometimes spontaneously looked lovingly into each other’s eyes and sang the love ballad “Always” to each other. And there was often the touching scene through the years of how they walked together hand in hand.

And maybe next in line were her older sister, Lillian, her father, Joseph Wassel, and her mother, Cecilia Wassel. Her parents gave life to Doris on May 31, 1928, in Bishop, Maryland. Yet just two years later, Cecilia died, leaving Doris with no memories of her mother. Still, she and Lillian had the influence of their Aunt Addie—who had no children, who lived on a farm in Maryland and welcomed them every summer, giving the sisters a real sense of a mother’s love. And there was also the love of her step-mother, Marge, as an adult.

From those roots of love and loss, Doris became an exceptional mother to her five children—Maureen, John (Shawn), Rose, Joe and Doreen. She modeled strength, grace, perseverance and spirit. She also blessed them with the example of how to live unconditionally, give generously and embrace—and never take for granted—the gifts of life, faith, health and family.

And there were the countless special moments with her children in a range of ways: from Maureen giving her mother flowers on her wedding day, to pouring her heart and soul into welcoming Mom into her home and caring for her with so much love during those years; from Joe taking her and Dad to restaurants, to circuses, on a cruise and other adventures, to showering her with his light, his joy and his devotion; from Rose taking her on numerous shopping, driving and dining excursions, to adding an abundance of adventure, goodness and joy to her life; from Doreen using her gifts to always make Mom look stylish and glowing, to providing so many extra touches of beauty, fun and warmth for her; from Shawn knowing all the ways she was there for him through the years, to striving to stay close to her with daily phone calls, weekly letters and visits.

The bond between Doris and her children was life-giving. And when her children married, she viewed their spouses as her children too, always noting how blessed she was by Mary, Jay, John and Joe. She also shared her love abundantly with her grandchildren, John Michael, Brian, Dan, Kathleen (Katie), Shauna, Megan, Joseph and Mason. Ask any of them to share a favorite story or memory of their grandmother and they will do so with a great smile. Here are some examples:

Remember the time she charmed the security guards at the entrance to the Empire State Building in New York City, leading them to let her—and 16 other members of her family—to go straight to the front of the line?

Remember the sherbet punch, homemade potato salad and the other treats she served on Christmas Eve—and how the same Christmas angel topped the tree for all 67 years of their marriage?

Remember her in the kitchen, quickly whipping up a breakfast of eggs, bacon, scrapple, melted cheese and biscuits for a full table of people?

Remember how she secretly slipped us “treat” money?

Remember how she babysat us, cheered for us, and spoiled us?

Her smile, her embrace and her love welcomed the people who have married one of her grandchildren---Kathleen Bridget, Jen, Kim, Mark, Chris and Marc. Her generosity and love also extended to her five great-grandchildren, Annie, Finn, Jack, Grace and Calvin. Her smile glowed even brighter for them.

For years, Doris was a supervisor of telephone operators for Bell Telephone. She loved reading, going to the movies and watching “All Creatures Great and Small.” She loved getting flowers, especially daisies, savoring Butter Pecan ice cream and starting her mornings with coffee and a doughnut. She couldn’t resist fresh crab meat, shrimp salad and Johnson’s caramel popcorn. Most of all, she couldn’t resist anything that was chocolate. And anytime she visited her Aunt Addie in Maryland, her voice would suddenly adopt a Southern accent. In her later years, she would often say “Lordy be” in reaction to a wide range of things, while she ended nearly every conversation with “God bless” followed by “I love you.”

Doris was the last surviving member of the extended Shaughnessy family of aunts and uncles who shaped the lives of the generations that have followed, doing so through their loving emphasis on family and faith. Besides Doris and John, that group included Ann and Eddie Erkert, Mary and Mike Minahan, Josie and Eddie Lafferty, Eileen and Harry Rhea, and Lillian and Tommy Goughan.

Doris’ Legacy is the legacy of many women, many mothers---a legacy modeled by the Blessed Mother, whose image Doris featured prominently on the front windowsill of her family’s home. Doris knew heartbreak and pain in her life, but that never stopped her from giving comfort, from being there for others, from pouring out her love completely.

In this tribute to Doris, it seems fitting to refer to her surviving family members as those who have been blessed by her life: her children, Maureen Shaughnessy (John Strubinger), John “Shawn” Shaughnessy (Mary), Rose Stauffer (Jay), Joseph Shaughnessy, and Doreen McDonough (Joe). Her grandchildren include John Michael (Jen), Brian (Kathleen Bridget), Dan (Kim), Kathleen Marie (Chris), Shauna (Mark), Megan (Marc), Joseph and Mason. Her great-grandchildren are Annie, Finn, Jack, Grace and Calvin.

Relatives and friends are invited to her Viewing from 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. on Friday, March 7, at The Donohue Funeral Home, 8401 West Chester Pike, (corner of Lynn Blvd.), Upper Darby, PA and to her Funeral Mass at 10:30 a.m. on Saturday, March 8, in St. Laurence Church, 8245 West Chester Pike, Upper Darby. Interment will be at SS. Peter and Paul Cemetery in Springfield, PA.

In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to the American Heart Association and to St. Laurence Church.

One last thought: Doris has been welcomed by the angels as one of their own, and she’s still smiling on you.